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Danny Welbeck gif

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via??http://www.101greatgoals.com/blog/gif-danny-welbecks-brilliant-backhell-england-v-sweden/
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England vs lovebox

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The Winner Takes it All – Euroguff day 8

EUROGUFF SWEDEN SPECIAL!

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Jamie quips, "Swedish is a North Germanic language, related and very similar to Danish and Norwegian, but differing in pronunciation and orthography.??Along with Finnish, four other minority languages are also recognized: Me??nkieli, Sami, Romani and Yiddish"

I have a dream: Sweden v England
Forty-four Euroguffers have England winning, with twenty experience-weary souls fearing a draw.??Just one tea-bothering revolutionary, Mr Awesome, has Sweden beating England.??An American by nature, Mr Awesome has, by curious coincidence, today been reported to the Home Office for visa irregularities.

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Money, Money, Money – the England manager, yesterday

SOS
Sweden win
Mamma Mia
draw
Mr. Awesome 2012sheds
Roy Hodgson
Mike Bassett
Simon Grayson
McFuddle 'O Toole
Ronaldo McDonald??
Don revie
Earsane Wanger
Tom Laidlaw
Toy Dodgson
Brown Fox
George Osborne is a twat
Septic Tank Charlton
Lorem Ipsum
Bring Back Bobby Robson
Canary
Christophe Woodini
Big Ron Colonel Saunders
Trap A Tony
Claudio Inglesias Failte

Voulez Vous:??Ukraine v France
47 Euroguffers are Taking a Chance on France, with just four Laying All Their Love on Ukraine

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??- Michel Platini not looking at all French, yesterday

Super Troupers

Ukraine win
Fernandos
draw
El Pringle Andy Grey
Benny The Ball Roy Hodgson
Septic Tank Charlton Sepp Bladder
Dirk Diggler Mike Bassett
Strev87
Scotty McNasty
Tom Laidlaw
Ivor Greatidea
Mr. Awesome
Canary
Soccer Sage
Bill Shankly
The Special [Measures] One
Normski Gunner

Knowing Me, Knowing You
Awkwardly, I'm now in equal first place. I've had this Jay bloke pestering me all day – something about my texts to Roy Hodgson, but I simply can't remember.

Dancing Dancing Queen Total
1= Tim Henman david hickson 18
1= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 18
1= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 18
1= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 18
1= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon Huesser 18
1= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 18
7= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 16
7= Yankee's Spankers Dave Robertshaw 16
7= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 16
7= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 16
7= Vuvuzela???? Sandra Benfer 16
7= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 16
7= Stevie's Wunders Steve Andrews 16
7= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 16
15= 2012sheds Pete smith 14
15= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 14
15= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 14
15= B B Foot Rory 14
15= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 14
15= Steve Mclaren JT 14
15= Don revie Simon Andrews 14
15= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 14
15= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 14
15= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 14
15= Gazza Gary Taylor 14
15= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 14
15= Fabio Crapello Martin B 14
15= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 14
15= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 14
15= Normski Gunner Norman House 14
15= Swiss T Thomas Angst 14
32= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 12
32= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 12
32= El Pringle Keith Pringle 12
32= McFuddle 'O Toole Gordon?? 12
32= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 12
32= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 12
32= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 12
32= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 12
32= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 12
32= Canary Simon Barnes 12
32= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 12
32= Hatch's Heros Chris Matthews 12
32= Trap A Tony Tony Power 12
45= DK Willy DK 10
45= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 10
45= roy the hodgson harvey 10
45= Ronaldo McDonald?? Cephas Howard?? 10
45= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 10
45= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 10
45= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 10
45= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 10
45= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 10
45= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 10
45= Letina lotagoals?? Berry 10
56= Strev87 dave strevett 8
56= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 8
56= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 8
56= Mozzer Paul Conroy 8
56= Messi Gardener Johnny T?? 8
56= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 8
62= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 6
62= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 6
62= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 6
65 Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 4

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Today's update has been sponsored by Volvo?? – the safest way to predict football matches whilst driving to Ikea. AHA!
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TORRES/INIESTA

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Oh Trapattoni – you used to be Italian but you’re Irish now

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German LOLs

Hat tip: Jim C
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More evidence of Rockabilly making a comeback

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You’ll never beat the Irish – Euroguff Day 7

NEW GIMMICK!

Last night we had Euroguff Live as @subterranean_ Eddie Gufftweeted from a pub in Holland as the Edam fanciers tiptoed to the brink of exiting Euro 2012. No fewer than thirteen predictors have them as tournament winners.

OLD GIMMICK!
Who Should I Be Cheering For Today?

Italy v Croatia, 5pm
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Most Euroguffers have this down as a win for Italy, but three Dalmatians have the Croats being victorious.

Draw Croatia win
Tim Henman roy the hodgson
Bayer Neverlusen Soccer Sage
Roy Hodgson Letina lotagoals 
Sepp Bladder  
Simon Grayson  
B B Foot  
McFuddle ‘O Toole  
Benny The Ball  
Tom Laidlaw  
Brown Fox  
Arsenedof Nowhere  
Septic Tank Charlton  
Bring Back Bobby Robson  
Naven Johnson  
Canary  
Wicked Woy Wodgson  
Hatch’s Heros  
The Special [Measures] One  
Normski Gunner  
Del Garnett  

Spain v Ireland, 7.45pm
A fierce game for the Irish. No fewer that sixty-tree Euroguffers see this as an open goal for the, er, reigning world and European champions. Mr Awesome sticks his neck out for a draw but someone buy Claudio Inglesias Failte a pint of Guinness, a packet of Taito and a large Jameson chaser! Green-blooded Claud stands grand as the only player to have Ireland down to win this fecker. The same Claude recently got into trouble with his wife when he bet their house on Jedward for Eurovision.

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 – Claude, yesterday

  Martin Sorrell Shareholders Total
1= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon Huesser 16
1= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 16
3= Tim Henman david hickson 14
3= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 14
3= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 14
3= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 14
3= Yankee’s Spankers Dave Robertshaw 14
3= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 14
3= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 14
3= Vuvuzela   Sandra Benfer 14
3= Stevie’s Wunders Steve Andrews 14
12= 2012sheds Pete smith 12
12= Steve Mclaren JT 12
12= Don revie Simon Andrews 12
12= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 12
12= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 12
12= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 12
12= Gazza Gary Taylor 12
12= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 12
12= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 12
12= Fabio Crapello Martin B 12
12= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 12
12= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 12
12= Swiss T Thomas Angst 12
25= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 10
25= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 10
25= El Pringle Keith Pringle 10
25= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 10
25= B B Foot Rory 10
25= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 10
25= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 10
25= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 10
25= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 10
25= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 10
25= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 10
25= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 10
25= Trap A Tony Tony Power 10
25= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 10
25= Normski Gunner Norman House 10
40= DK Willy DK 8
40= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 8
40= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 8
40= roy the hodgson harvey 8
40= McFuddle ‘O Toole Gordon  8
40= Ronaldo McDonald  Cephas Howard  8
40= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 8
40= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 8
40= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 8
40= Canary Simon Barnes 8
40= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 8
40= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 8
40= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 8
40= Hatch’s Heros Chris Matthews 8
40= Letina lotagoals  Berry 8
40= Strev87 dave strevett 6
56= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 6
56= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 6
56= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 6
56= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 6
56= Mozzer Paul Conroy 6
56= Messi Gardener Johnny T  6
56= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 6
56= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 6
64 Lorem Ipsum Jon D 4
65 Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 2!!!!!

INTRODUCING THE OFFICIAL EUROGUFF LOGO!
Thanks to Harry Redface, aka Dan McGrath

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The Euroguff word and device are registered trademarks of Euroguff Industries – a wholly-owned subsidiary of Mr Byrite.
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Official Euroguff logo!

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Thanks to Harry Redface, aka Dan of the world's finest sound agency
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Euroguff LIVE PHOTOBLOGGING

Anglophile Eddie, the Texan Sicilian, is reporting LIVE for Euroguff in Holland. Yes, it's a beautiful, global game people.

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SCHWEINSTEIGER

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Spit and Polish – Euroguff day 6

According to Jamie Carragher, it was the Polish union with Lithuania which brought pro-Western Catholic Poland and Orthodox Russia into a real, constant relation with both states engaged in the contest for the political, strategic and civilizational preponderance in Central and Eastern Europe.??

Good game wasn't it!?

NEW FEATURE -??Who Should I Be Cheering For Today????
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??- These Euroguffers had forgotten they'd backed Germany

Denmark v Portgual, 5pm

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??- Ronaldo, yesterday

Everyone has it down as a Portugal win, except for:

Draw Denmark win
DK Willy McFuddle 'O Toole
Bayer Neverlusen Mrs Euroguff
El Pringle Canary
Strev87
Don revie
Tom Laidlaw
Toy Bodgson
Soccer Sage
Claudio Inglesias Failte

Holland v Germany, 7.45pm

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??- this has always been a friendly fixture

This match is much more divisive:

Holland win Draw German win
Andy Grey DK Willy 2012sheds
Benny The Ball Tim Henman Bayer Neverlusen
Don revie Dario Made-the-Gradi Roy Hodgson
Earsane Wanger El Pringle Sepp Bladder
Tom Laidlaw Mike Bassett Simon Grayson
George Osborne is a twat B B Foot roy the hodgson
Mr. Awesome McFuddle 'O Toole Ronaldo McDonald??
Naven Johnson Strev87 Toy Dodgson
Toy Bodgson Scotty McNasty Mrs Euroguff
Bill Shankly Steve Mclaren Is Pele Playing?
Mozzer Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Kicker Conspiracy
Wheat Dodger Brown Fox Yankee's Spankers
Christophe Woodini Harry Redface Gazza
Trap A Tony Ivor Greatidea Hansi Mueller
Normski Gunner Arsenedof Nowhere Vuvuzela????
Del Garnett Septic Tank Charlton Wicked Woy Wodgson
Simoneo Huesserelli Fabio Crapello
Lorem Ipsum The Special [Measures] One
Bring Back Bobby Robson Messi Gardener
Canary Letina lotagoals??
Soccer Sage
Paulo Di Harringtonio
Anjusha Klins-Morinho
Big Ron Colonel Saunders
Hatch's Heros
Stevie's Wunders
Claudio Inglesias Failte
Dirk Diggler
Swiss T

CLASSIFIED AD – any of you designers out there fancy knocking out a quick logo for Euroguff? I think the brand proposition is "Sporting nonsense for today's shirkers". Five thousand drachmas for the best design

The standings
Civil Partnership Name Married name Total
1= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon Huesser 14
1= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 14
3= Tim Henman david hickson 12
3= Don revie Simon Andrews 12
3= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 12
3= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 12
3= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 12
3= Stevie's Wunders Steve Andrews 12
9= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 10
9= El Pringle Keith Pringle 10
9= Steve Mclaren JT 10
9= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 10
9= Yankee's Spankers Dave Robertshaw 10
9= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 10
9= Vuvuzela???? Sandra Benfer 10
9= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 10
9= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 10
9= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 10
9= Swiss T Thomas Angst 10
20= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 8
20= DK Willy DK 8
20= 2012sheds Pete smith 8
20= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 8
20= B B Foot Rory 8
20= McFuddle 'O Toole Gordon?? 8
20= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 8
20= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 8
20= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 8
20= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 8
20= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 8
20= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 8
20= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 8
20= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 8
20= Canary Simon Barnes 8
20= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 8
20= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 8
20= Gazza Gary Taylor 8
20= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 8
20= Fabio Crapello Martin B 8
20= Trap A Tony Tony Power 8
20= Normski Gunner Norman House 8
42= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 6
42= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 6
42= Strev87 dave strevett 6
42= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 6
42= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 6
42= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 6
42= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 6
42= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 6
42= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 6
42= Hatch's Heros Chris Matthews 6
42= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 6
42= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 6
54= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 4
54= roy the hodgson harvey 4
54= Ronaldo McDonald?? Cephas Howard?? 4
54= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 4
54= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 4
54= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 4
54= Mozzer Paul Conroy 4
54= Letina lotagoals?? Berry 4
54= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 4
63= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 2
63= Messi Gardener Johnny T?? 2
65 Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 0
??
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Greece is the way we are feeling – Euroguff day 5

England v France – TV screen grab of the day

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Who will get off the mark first? Jon D and Dave Crook have evidently mistaken the Euros for Eurovision and remain on Nil Points. It is particularly enjoyable that Dave is being trounced by his son Harvey who is in the Euroguff Youth League. And Jon’s favourite cliche is “Football, bloody hell”. Indeed. Let’s focus in on their predictions today:

    Greece v Czech Republic Poland v Russia
Lorem Ipsum Jon D away win away win
Dario Made-the-Gradi Dave C draw home win

And how Euroguffers see it in aggregate:
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Meanwhile, the chasing peloton have chased down Mrs Euroguff and there are now six players tied for first place. 

  Pr0n name Prom name Total
1= El Pringle Keith Pringle 10
1= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon 10
1= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 10
1= Vuvuzela   Sandra Benfer 10
1= Stevie’s Wunders Steve Andrews 10
1= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 10
7= Tim Henman david hickson 8
7= 2012sheds Pete smith 8
7= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 8
7= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 8
7= Don revie Simon Andrews 8
7= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 8
7= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 8
7= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 8
7= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 8
7= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 8
7= Yankee’s Spankers Dave Robertshaw 8
7= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 8
7= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 8
7= Swiss T Thomas Angst 8
21= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 6
21= DK Willy DK 6
21= McFuddle ‘O Toole Gordon  6
21= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 6
21= Steve Mclaren JT 6
21= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 6
21= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 6
21= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 6
21= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 6
21= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 6
21= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 6
21= Canary Simon Barnes 6
21= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 6
21= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 6
21= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 6
21= Hatch’s Heros Chris Matthews 6
37= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 4
37= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 4
37= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 4
37= B B Foot Rory 4
37= Strev87 dave strevett 4
37= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 4
37= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 4
37= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 4
37= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 4
37= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 4
37= Gazza Gary Taylor 4
37= Mozzer Paul Conroy 4
37= Fabio Crapello Martin B 4
37= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 4
37= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 4
37= Trap A Tony Tony Power 4
37= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 4
37= Normski Gunner Norman House 4
37= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 4
37= Letina lotagoals  Berry 4
57= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 2
57= roy the hodgson harvey 2
57= Ronaldo McDonald  Cephas Howard  2
57= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 2
57= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 2
57= Messi Gardener Johnny T  2
57= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 2
64= Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 0
64= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 0
Recent twittering – hashtag #euroguff

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England expects – Euroguff Day 4

This blog post was scheduled to be guest edited by Rio Ferdinand, but at the last minute, I decided to do it myself – for footballing reasons.

So today's the day when this beautiful and open tournament with it's free-flowing spirit and sublime displays of skill welcomes… John Terry and England. What could possibly go wrong???

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??- England fans amassed near Donetsk, earlier.

It's also the day when all the play-it-down, low key expectations get bundled head first out of the window. At 4.59pm the nation will once again throw off what is now 46 years of hurt and levitate collectively – "WE COULD WIN THIS YOU KNOW!"

Euroguffers' predictions for England v France 5pm:

LIONHEARTS
England win
EUROSCEPTICS
Draw
SEDITIONISTS
France win
Andy Grey DK Willy 2012sheds
Dario Made-the-Gradi Tim Henman Bayer Neverlusen
Simon Grayson Sepp Bladder Roy Hodgson
B B Foot El Pringle Mike Bassett
Ronaldo McDonald?? McFuddle 'O Toole roy the hodgson
Harry Redface Benny The Ball Strev87
Lorem Ipsum Steve Mclaren Scotty McNasty
Mr. Awesome Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Don revie
Naven Johnson Earsane Wanger Tom Laidlaw
Yankee's Spankers Arsenedof Nowhere Toy Dodgson
Mozzer Septic Tank Charlton Brown Fox
Hansi Mueller Simoneo Huesserelli Ivor Greatidea
Vuvuzela???? Bring Back Bobby Robson George Osborne is a twat
Fabio Crapello Is Pele Playing? Mrs Euroguff
Messi Gardener Toy Bodgson Soccer Sage
Kicker Conspiracy Bill Shankly
Canary Wicked Woy Wodgson
Gazza Christophe Woodini
Paulo Di Harringtonio Anjusha Klins-Morinho
Wheat Dodger Big Ron Colonel Saunders
Stevie's Wunders Hatch's Heros
Normski Gunner Trap A Tony
Claudio Inglesias Failte The Special [Measures] One
Letina lotagoals?? Swiss T
Dirk Diggler
Del Garnett

Oh yeah, that other game:

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Euroguff League table after six games
Awkwardly, my wife is now clear leader. I promise there's no fiddling or hacking going on! Don't put me in front of Leveson!!

Weekend name Office name Total
1 Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 10
2= 2012sheds Pete smith 8
2= Don revie Simon Andrews 8
2= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 8
2= Vuvuzela???? Sandra Benfer 8
2= Stevie's Wunders Steve Andrews 8
2= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 8
2= Swiss T Thomas Angst 8
9= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 6
9= El Pringle Keith Pringle 6
9= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 6
9= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon 6
9= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 6
9= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 6
9= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 6
9= Yankee's Spankers Dave Robertshaw 6
9= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 6
9= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 6
9= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 6
9= Hatch's Heros Chris Matthews 6
21= DK Willy DK 4
21= Tim Henman david hickson 4
21= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 4
21= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 4
21= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 4
21= B B Foot Rory 4
21= McFuddle 'O Toole Gordon?? 4
21= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 4
21= Strev87 dave strevett 4
21= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 4
21= Steve Mclaren JT 4
21= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 4
21= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 4
21= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 4
21= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 4
21= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 4
21= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 4
21= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 4
21= Canary Simon Barnes 4
21= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 4
21= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 4
21= Fabio Crapello Martin B 4
21= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 4
21= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 4
45= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 2
45= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 2
45= roy the hodgson harvey 2
45= Ronaldo McDonald?? Cephas Howard?? 2
45= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 2
45= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 2
45= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 2
45= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 2
45= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 2
45= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 2
45= Gazza Gary Taylor 2
45= Mozzer Paul Conroy 2
45= Trap A Tony Tony Power 2
45= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 2
45= Messi Gardener Johnny T?? 2
45= Normski Gunner Norman House 2
45= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 2
45= Letina lotagoals?? Berry 2
63= Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 0
63= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 0
63= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 0

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I’m not sure what this says about the global economy, but it was funny then and it’s funny now

World Cup 2010???
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Euro 2012
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The hashtag is??#don'ttellmerkel
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Pass the Dutchie – Euroguff Day 3

Even Hans Christian Andersen couldn’t make it up. The princes of Denmark suffered the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and still hung on to a one-nil win over the cloggy Dutch. 

The Danes have recently become known for brutal thrillers and it was cheering to see their fans working that family-friendly, heart-warming entertainment into their fancy dress
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Germany 1-0 Portugal
Ronaldo was left doing his Nick Clegg sad face as the Germans got off to a solid start – closet rockabilly Mario Gomez quiffing home the winning goal 

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Spain v Italy
What a mouthwatering mediterranean feast this should be. The reigning world and European champions come into the tournament as such favourites that just three Euroguffers (Andy Grey, Scotty McNasty and Harry Redface) have the Italians stopping the Spanish walking off with, ahem, a paella goals.

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Ireland v Croatia
Come on Ireland! Giovanni Trapattoni’s boys arrive with a gesture-laden confidence. This poll in today’s Irish Independent is surely not a sign of inflated expectations: 
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Statistically slightly more valid league table
Yes, my wife is in the lead. I am not fixing it (but I am hoping to get out of mowing the lawn today)

  Tax name Tax avoidance name Total
1= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 6
1= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 6
1= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 6
1= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 6
1= Swiss T Thomas Angst 6
6= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 4
6= 2012sheds Pete smith 4
6= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 4
6= McFuddle ‘O Toole Gordon  4
6= Strev87 dave strevett 4
6= Steve Mclaren JT 4
6= Don revie Simon Andrews 4
6= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 4
6= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 4
6= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 4
6= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 4
6= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon 4
6= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 4
6= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 4
6= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 4
6= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 4
6= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 4
6= Yankee’s Spankers Dave Robertshaw 4
6= Vuvuzela   Sandra Benfer 4
6= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 4
6= Hatch’s Heros Chris Matthews 4
6= Stevie’s Wunders Steve Andrews 4
6= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 4
29= DK Willy DK 2
29= Tim Henman david hickson 2
29= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 2
29= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 2
29= El Pringle Keith Pringle 2
29= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 2
29= roy the hodgson harvey 2
29= B B Foot Rory 2
29= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 2
29= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 2
29= Ronaldo McDonald  Cephas Howard  2
29= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 2
29= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 2
29= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 2
29= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 2
29= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 2
29= Canary Simon Barnes 2
29= Gazza Gary Taylor 2
29= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 2
29= Mozzer Paul Conroy 2
29= Fabio Crapello Martin B 2
29= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 2
29= Trap A Tony Tony Power 2
29= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 2
29= Messi Gardener Johnny T  2
29= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 2
55= Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 0
55= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 0
55= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 0
55= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 0
55= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 0
55= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 0
55= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 0
55= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 0
55= Normski Gunner Norman House 0
55= Letina lotagoals  Berry 0
55= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 0
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The official Euro 2012 logo, which pops up as a TV interstitial with remarkable frequency. Questionned by the official Mrs Euroguff as “What’s that [email protected]%king bit of lung?”
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Euroguff Uncategorized

Contributing to the Euroguff blog

If you find anything funny that fellow Euroguffers might enjoy, then you can post to the blog by emailing??"Euroguff" <[email protected]>.

The subject line of your email will be the blog title and youtube links etc. (usually) get magically transformed into embedded videos.
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Who Euroguffers think will win Euro 2012

Screen_shot_2012-06-09_at_13

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Euroguff Uncategorized

The Double Teapot – Euroguff day 2

After a splendidly odd opening ceremony that was just two edits away from a creepy Aphex Twin video, Euro 2012 is under way

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Poland v Greece was a cracking opener. After going a goal (and a man) down, there were devaluing rumours about the Germans having to come on and bail the Greeks out. In the end, they didn't need it and would have won other than for??that saved penalty.

And weren't Russia good! No-one from the 65 (SIXTY FIVE!!) Euroguff predictors has them down as tournament winners – just two hardline communist sympathisers have them making the semis – Medals For Work in Agriculture??get pinned on Dave Bassett (Eamonn N) and Don Revie (Simon A).

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Today should be a bloodbath. Time, ladies and gentlemen for the Group of Death!

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This is how Euroguffers?? see the scythe swinging:

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Just two heretics, Yankee's Spankers (Dave R) and Mrs Euroguff (Sally) have the Danes being great.

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Statistically Misleading Early League Table???
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Euroguffer Street name Total
1= Brown Fox Jim Chambers 4
1= Vuvuzela???? Sandra Benfer 4
1= Wheat Dodger Leanne McGirr 4
1= Wicked Woy Wodgson David Patterson 4
1= Del Garnett Darren Gavigan 4
1= Swiss T Thomas 4
7= Andy Grey Darren Holdaway 2
7= Tim Henman david hickson 2
7= 2012sheds Pete smith 2
7= Sepp Bladder Carl Mesner Lyons 2
7= Mike Bassett Eamonn Newell 2
7= B B Foot Rory 2
7= McFuddle 'O Toole Gordon?? 2
7= Benny The Ball Nick Townend 2
7= Strev87 dave strevett 2
7= Steve Mclaren JT 2
7= Ronaldo McDonald?? Cephas Howard?? 2
7= Don revie Simon Andrews 2
7= Earsane Wanger Paul Shaw 2
7= Toy Dodgson Kelsey O 2
7= Arsenedof Nowhere Darren Hanson 2
7= Septic Tank Charlton Jeremy Crisp 2
7= Simoneo Huesserelli Simon 2
7= Bring Back Bobby Robson Dan Jamieson 2
7= Mr. Awesome Geroge Pokorny 2
7= Naven Johnson Eddie Vassallo 2
7= Mrs Euroguff Mrs Carlosfandango_ 2
7= Is Pele Playing? John Orta 2
7= Toy Bodgson Tom Barton 2
7= Canary Simon Barnes 2
7= Soccer Sage Mike Xenakis 2
7= Christophe Woodini Chris Wood 2
7= Hatch's Heros Chris Matthews 2
7= Stevie's Wunders Steve Andrews 2
35= DK Willy DK 0
35= Dario Made-the-Gradi David of Crook 0
35= Bayer Neverlusen Rob Broome 0
35= Roy Hodgson John Catterfeld 0
35= El Pringle Keith Pringle 0
35= Simon Grayson Paul Revy 0
35= roy the hodgson harvey 0
35= Scotty McNasty Andrew Robb 0
35= Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) Matt Brooke-Smith 0
35= Tom Laidlaw Tom Laidlaw 0
35= Harry Redface Dan McGrath 0
35= Ivor Greatidea Steve Edney 0
35= George Osborne is a twat Andy Young 0
35= Lorem Ipsum Jon D 0
35= Kicker Conspiracy Tim Fiddies 0
35= Yankee's Spankers Dave Robertshaw 0
35= Bill Shankly Bob Steadman 0
35= Gazza Gary Taylor 0
35= Paulo Di Harringtonio Paul Harrington 0
35= Mozzer Paul Conroy 0
35= Hansi Mueller Bernd Friedle 0
35= Fabio Crapello Martin B 0
35= Anjusha Klins-Morinho Anna Wilson 0
35= Big Ron Colonel Saunders Andrew Hartland 0
35= Trap A Tony Tony Power 0
35= Dirk Diggler Nik Goodman 0
35= Messi Gardener Johnny T?? 0
35= Normski Gunner Norman House 0
35= Claudio Inglesias Failte Claude Tonna-Barthet 0
35= Letina lotagoals?? Berry 0
35= The Special [Measures] One Tim Donnelly Smith 0

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http://euroguff.posterous.com/twitter-and-euroguff
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Full footy disclosure

I’m playing this Euroguff too of course, and in the (very) unlikely event that I do well, I don’t want anyone thinking I’m rigging it.

So, here are my entries, also recorded for public posterity at pastebin

Timestamp 5/24/2012 11:08:32
Your comedy manager name Sepp Bladder
Your email address [email protected]
Group A games [Poland v Greece] home win
Group A games [Russia v Czech Republic] home win
Group A games [Greece v Czech Republic] draw
Group A games [Poland v Russia] draw
Group A games [Czech Republic v Poland] away win
Group A games [Greece v Russia] away win
Group B games [Netherlands v Denmark] home win
Group B games [Germany v Portugal] away win
Group B games [Denmark v Portugal] away win
Group B games [Netherlands v Germany] away win
Group B games [Portugal v Netherlands] draw
Group B games [Denmark v Germany] away win
Group C games [Spain v Italy] draw
Group C games [Ireland v Croatia] draw
Group C games [Italy v Croatia] draw
Group C games [Spain v Ireland] home win
Group C games [Croatia v Spain] away win
Group C games [Italy v Ireland] home win
Group D games [Ukraine v Sweden] home win
Group D games [France v England] draw
Group D games [Sweden v England] away win
Group D games [Ukraine v France] draw
Group D games [England v Ukraine] draw
Group D games [Sweden v France] draw
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Poland] Lose in Quarter finals (tick four)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Greece] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Russia] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Czech Republic] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Netherlands] Lose in Semis (tick two)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Denmark] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Germany] Losing finalist (tick one)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Portugal] WINNER (tick one)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Spain] Lose in Semis (tick two)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Italy] Lose in Quarter finals (tick four)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Ireland] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Croatia] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Ukraine] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [Sweden] Go out in group stages (tick eight)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [France] Lose in Quarter finals (tick four)
How far will each team get? (4 pts) [England] Lose in Quarter finals (tick four)
Tiebreaker: what minute will the first goal be scored in the final 23
Tiebreaker 2: What is your favourite football cliche/phrase The world cup – truly an international event
Real name Carl Mesner Lyons
Twitter account carlosfandango_