Categories
Mexico ’70
Categories
Spanish victory car horns #euroguff
In, er, Lausanne
Categories
And finally – Euroguff finale
Congratulations Spain – winners of Euro 2012
Arthur Andersen??have completed their audit of the results and these are??the final standings.??
Note there are no more places to hide??like??"21st equal" anymore,??as the standings have been sorted firstly on points and then on nearness to minute of first goal (everybody raise your hands for the??ABS??function in Excel).??Mildly interesting fact:??Letina lotagoals (@BerryRyan) was closest to guessing the correct time. She guessed 12' vs. actual 14'
| Real Name | Manager Name | ||
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 80 |
| 2 | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 68 |
| 3 | Tim Henman | david hickson | 66 |
| 4 | roy the hodgson | harvey | 66 |
| 5 | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 64 |
| 6 | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 64 |
| 7 | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 64 |
| 8 | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 64 |
| 9 | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 62 |
| 10 | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 62 |
| 11 | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 62 |
| 12 | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 62 |
| 13 | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 14 | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 60 |
| 15 | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 60 |
| 16 | B B Foot | Rory | 60 |
| 17 | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 58 |
| 18 | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 58 |
| 19 | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 58 |
| 20 | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 58 |
| 21 | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 58 |
| 22 | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 56 |
| 23 | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 56 |
| 24 | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 56 |
| 25 | Canary | Simon Barnes | 56 |
| 26 | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 27 | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 54 |
| 28 | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 54 |
| 29 | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 54 |
| 30 | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 54 |
| 31 | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 54 |
| 32 | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 54 |
| 33 | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 54 |
| 34 | DK Willy | DK | 54 |
| 35 | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 54 |
| 36 | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 52 |
| 37 | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 52 |
| 38 | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 52 |
| 39 | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 52 |
| 40 | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 52 |
| 41 | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 52 |
| 42 | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 52 |
| 43 | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 50 |
| 44 | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 50 |
| 45 | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 50 |
| 46 | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 50 |
| 47 | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 50 |
| 48 | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 50 |
| 49 | Steve Mclaren | JT | 48 |
| 50 | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 48 |
| 51 | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 48 |
| 52 | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 48 |
| 53 | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 48 |
| 54 | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 46 |
| 55 | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 46 |
| 56 | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 57 | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 44 |
| 58 | Strev87 | dave strevett | 44 |
| 59 | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 42 |
| 60 | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 61 | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 62 | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 42 |
| 63 | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 42 |
| 64 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 40 |
| 65 | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
Congratulations to clear winner??Paulo Di Harringtono??- Euroguff Supreme Champion 2012!
And nose-holding commiserations to Jeremy Crisp, winner of our pungent??Brown Jersey, who tied on points, but guessed nine minutes worse on goal time.
??- Jeremy, planning his revenge, yesterday
An archive of all these Euroguff posts is here??and??nosey spreadsheet types??can??see all the entries??here.
Thanks for playing.??See you in Brasil.
If you've enjoyed playing, please share and support the??Official Euroguff Charity Appeal
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Official Euroguff Charity Appeal
If you’ve enjoyed playing Euroguff, then please read this and support grass roots African football
A good friend of mine, and Euroguff player, is involved in The Rifti Valley Soccer Academy. Based in the small town of Rongai, Kenya, it’s aim is to provide football coaching to the children from the Rongai slums.
The goal is to provide the children with fun, stop them getting bored and into trouble and to learn good values through teamwork.
If Guffers are level on points after tonight’s final, then the minute of the first goal will come into play. Below is the distribution of predictions across the potential 0-120 minutes. Quite data beautiful isn’t it. Most people by far think the first goal will be in the opening 45 minutes. Only two guffers think the first goal will be in extra time and one miserly radical thinks it’ll be 0-0 after 120 minutes.
Categories
Idea for Swiss Eminem tribute act
Emmental.
“Sandwiches would be so empty – without me”
Categories
Analyse this – Euroguff Day 23
No games today, so in Test Match Special stylee, I shall guff on about something tangential whilst alternating between an unfathomably posh voice and a heavily accented one.
Here at Prediction Towers we love bit of nerdery, so away with anecdotes about cake, pigeons or passing buses, here’s a trip into the Euroguff analytics.
Left to my own devices
42% of predictors used a mobile phone to get their hands on Euroguff news. That over-indexes against the expected platform distribution.
Truly an international event
Visitors from fifteen countries have had their passports stamped with the Euroguff logo. I am particular intrigued to see that the game was accessed once from the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia.
Social media
62% of visits came via social referral, with Twitter being eight times more potent than facebook
– Mark Zuckerberg buying a commemorative plate for $1bn, yesterday
Who’s the Linux user!?
Bill Gates will not be happy that 78% of visits come from Euroguffers rocking Apple operating systems. Just 29% from Windows and there was one sweaty boffin using Linux lentilware.
– Bill Gates with the new Microsoft Surface tablet, yesterday
Euroguff archive
Well done Balotelli
Are Italy peaking at the right moment?
Spain v Italy – the Final
How Euroguffers see it. Not many had the Italians getting all the way to the final.
- Spain: 37% to win the final and 31% to lose the final
- Italy: 2% to win the final and 3% to lose the final
Penultimate table after the two semi-final exits
| Super Name | Super Mario Name | ||
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 76 |
| 2= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 64 |
| 2= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 64 |
| 2= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 64 |
| 5= | Tim Henman | david hickson | 62 |
| 5= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 62 |
| 5= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 62 |
| 5= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 62 |
| 9= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 60 |
| 9= | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 9= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 60 |
| 9= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 60 |
| 13= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 58 |
| 13= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 58 |
| 13= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 58 |
| 13= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 58 |
| 13= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 58 |
| 13= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 58 |
| 19= | B B Foot | Rory | 56 |
| 19= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 19= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 56 |
| 19= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 56 |
| 19= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 56 |
| 19= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 56 |
| 19= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 56 |
| 26= | DK Willy | DK | 54 |
| 26= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 54 |
| 26= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 54 |
| 26= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 54 |
| 26= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 54 |
| 31= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 52 |
| 31= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 52 |
| 31= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 52 |
| 31= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 52 |
| 35= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 50 |
| 35= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 50 |
| 35= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 50 |
| 35= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 50 |
| 35= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 50 |
| 35= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 50 |
| 35= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 50 |
| 35= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 50 |
| 35= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 50 |
| 35= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 50 |
| 35= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 50 |
| 46= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 48 |
| 46= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 48 |
| 46= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 48 |
| 46= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 48 |
| 46= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 48 |
| 46= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 48 |
| 52= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 52= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 44 |
| 52= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 52= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 44 |
| 56= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 56= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 56= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 42 |
| 56= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 42 |
| 56= | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 42 |
| 56= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 62= | Strev87 | dave strevett | 40 |
| 62= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 64 | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 65 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 36 |
How long does it take to make a piece of string?
Brilliant Euro 2012 animation
Tweet to the beat
People are ready to put Ronaldo on trial for Portugal's penalty exit, but he has declined to answer questions and has taken the fifth.
Either way, the Portugese are homeward bound,??so who gets to play Spain in the final?
Semi Final 2: Germany v Italy
More guffpoints up for grabs tonight. 22% have Italy crying onto their carpaccio whereas 17% have the Germans weeping on their weisswurst????
??-??Mario Ballotelli's hair farm, yesterday
Points with only two matches left
| Fourth penalty | Fifth penalty | ||
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 76 |
| 2= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 64 |
| 2= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 64 |
| 4= | Tim Henman | david hickson | 62 |
| 4= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 62 |
| 4= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 62 |
| 7= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 60 |
| 7= | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 7= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 60 |
| 7= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 60 |
| 11= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 58 |
| 11= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 58 |
| 11= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 58 |
| 11= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 58 |
| 11= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 58 |
| 11= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 58 |
| 11= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 58 |
| 18= | B B Foot | Rory | 56 |
| 18= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 18= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 56 |
| 18= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 56 |
| 18= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 56 |
| 18= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 56 |
| 18= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 56 |
| 25= | DK Willy | DK | 54 |
| 25= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 54 |
| 25= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 54 |
| 25= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 54 |
| 29= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 52 |
| 29= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 52 |
| 29= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 52 |
| 29= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 52 |
| 33= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 50 |
| 33= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 50 |
| 33= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 50 |
| 33= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 50 |
| 33= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 50 |
| 33= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 50 |
| 33= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 50 |
| 33= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 50 |
| 33= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 50 |
| 33= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 50 |
| 43= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 48 |
| 43= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 48 |
| 43= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 48 |
| 43= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 48 |
| 47= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 46 |
| 47= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 46 |
| 49= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 49= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 44 |
| 49= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 44 |
| 49= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 44 |
| 49= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 44 |
| 49= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 49= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 44 |
| 56= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 56= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 56= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 42 |
| 56= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 42 |
| 56= | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 42 |
| 56= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 62= | Strev87 | dave strevett | 40 |
| 62= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 64 | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 65 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 36 |
Archive of all Euroguffery??
Categories
Mano-a-mano – Euroguff day 20
NEW GIMMICK – Euroguff Quiz!
As every 1940s public schoolboy knows, the Iberian Peninsula is located in the extreme southwest of Europe and includes the modern-day sovereign states of Spain, Portugal and Andorra, as well as the British Overseas Territory Gambling Capital of Gibraltar.
As such, Iberia is the westernmost of the three major southern European peninsulas. But what are the other two? Answer at the end of this post.
Semi Final 1: Spain v Portugal
29% of Euroguffers have Spain losing in the semi finals and 14% have Portugal going out tonight. Let's hope they play fair. We don't want to see anyone jamon it up.
??- Ronaldo, with another new hairstyle, yesterday
Secrets of a WINNER
Paulo Di Harringtonio, currently leader of the pack (but not in that way) shares his prediction methodology. Paulo, an IT whizz-boffin linked up an authentic WWII Enigma machine to a ZX81 and a Microsoft Zune to compute all the permutations and spill out his match predictions.
??
Quiz answer
s??lnsu??u??d u????l??q pu?? u????l????I
Congratulations to Euroguffer Lorem Ipsum (@JonDavie) and wife Amanda. Jon may be languishing in 63rd position, but he is officially top of the world after fathering a small child in the early hours of yesterday morning.??
By the grace of God, the world's newest Scouser arrived at 4.30am Monday morning, thus avoiding England's penalty exit being his first experience of the world.
??- Available in all good branches of Aldi, yesterday
Sort of NSFW
In case you've not seen this yet,??England Fan Flashes Italian Penalty Taker
Your favourite football cliches
"It's a game of two halves" was particularly popular:
| Andy Grey | Ron Atkinson on Chile's options: "Chile have three options ??? they could win or they could lose. It???s up to them, the tide is in their court now." |
| DK Willy | In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol – it was the worst 20 minutes of my life |
| Tim Henman | "Players lose you games, not tactics. There's so much crap talked about tactics by people who barely know how to win at dominoes."?? – HRH Brian Clough |
| 2012sheds | gave it 110% |
| Dario Made-the-Gradi | You just can't do that at this level! |
| Bayer Neverlusen | "Rome wasn't built in a day. But I wasn't on that particuar job." |
| Roy Hodgson | Some people believe football is a matter of life and death. I'm very disappointed with that attitude. I can assure you it is much, much more important than that. |
| Sepp Bladder | The world cup – truly an international event |
| El Pringle | Interesting, very interesting. |
| Mike Bassett | I'm not getting ahead of myself. I'm just taking it one tie-breaker at a time. |
| Simon Grayson | It's a bad time to concede ('cause there are good times??) |
| roy the hodgson | football,bloody hell! |
| B B Foot | At the end of the day |
| McFuddle 'O Toole | Did you smash it? |
| Benny The Ball | Like I said, we gave it 110% like I said. |
| Strev87 | 'Football is not a matter of life or death, but rather something more important' |
| Scotty McNasty | For a big lad, he's good with his feet |
| Steve Mclaren | If football was meant to be played in the clouds, he'd have put grass up there. |
| Ronaldo McDonald?? | "Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw." Ron Atkinson Or anything by Ron, hilarious :)?? |
| Don revie | Dirty Leeds |
| Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | The most important thing is that we got the three points (Wayne Bridge aka Trigger as Chelsea beat Arsenal in the Carling Cup Final) |
| Earsane Wanger | It's a game of 2 halves innit? |
| Tom Laidlaw | You don't win games without scoring goals. |
| Toy Dodgson | It's balls in the back of the net that count…. |
| Brown Fox | I AM NOT A WHEELER DEALER. |
| Harry Redface | Eeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaauuuuuuhhhhhhhhhaaaaawwwwwwwwww…Unbelievable!!!!! (Gary Neville – Torres Goal / Semi final Champion's League) |
| Ivor Greatidea | I just hit it |
| George Osborne is a twat | "These things tend to even themselves out over the course of a season" |
| Arsenedof Nowhere | He's got a great left peg |
| Septic Tank Charlton | Isn't it called soccer? |
| Simoneo Huesserelli | Every game is a cup final now |
| Lorem Ipsum | Football.?? Bloody Hell. |
| Bring Back Bobby Robson | Pump it at the big man – England manager Tiki taka my arse – England fan We're just not very good at football – England Dan |
| Mr. Awesome | Jose Mourinho is a little twat. |
| Naven Johnson | I will lost this tiebreaker for sure 😉 |
| Mrs Euroguff | Tremendous! |
| Is Pele Playing? | It usually comes down to which team scores the most. |
| Toy Bodgson | Football's just a branch of science |
| Kicker Conspiracy | Eyebrows to the back stick |
| Canary | Its a gmae of 2 halves |
| Soccer Sage | The team that scores the most points will win. |
| Yankee's Spankers | two world wars and one world cup, doodah, doodah |
| Bill Shankly | Not so much a cliche, more the best fan shout I've ever heard. At CPFC, Alan Pinkney was having a shocker. The shout went up "Pinkney, you're so shite they should take you off and bring on Perkney!!" |
| Gazza | If Everton were playing at the bottom of the garden, I'd pull the curtains. |
| Paulo Di Harringtonio | "Sh*t – did you see that?" – Alan Partridge |
| Mozzer | Alex Ferguson "Football. Bloody hell!" |
| Hansi Mueller | after the match is before the match |
| Vuvuzela???? | Andi M??ller: Mailand oder Madrid – Hauptsache Italien! Andy Moeller: Milan or Madrid – mainly Italy! |
| Wheat Dodger | It's a game of two halves. |
| Wicked Woy Wodgson | I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don't know into what religion yet. |
| Fabio Crapello | It's a game of two halves… |
| Christophe Woodini | It's a game of two halves?? |
| Anjusha Klins-Morinho | It's a game of two halves! |
| Big Ron Colonel Saunders | its deja vue all over again |
| Hatch's Heros | Six of one, half a dozen of another. |
| Trap A Tony | I think there gonna try and nick one early door and then park the bus / shut up shop (delete as necessary).?? |
| The Special [Measures] One | "If Glenn Hoddle said one word to his team at half-time, it was concentration and focus." |
| Messi Gardener | It's a game of two halves.?? |
| Stevie's Wunders | My heart goes out to the lads.?? |
| Normski Gunner | We need to give 110% to win this game and we will give that maximum effort today, Brian! |
| Claudio Inglesias Failte | We were robbed |
| Letina lotagoals?? | DES … It's the bitter tasting icing on the filthy tasting cake.?? …. I've e |
| Dirk Diggler | "He's playing in the hole" |
| Del Garnett | The boy's done good, you know, he's covered every inch of grass out there |
| Swiss T | "With the offense you win games, but with the defense you win championships." And here is the one I hate (consider that I am swiss and we are not participating): "Every defeat is a victory in itself."?? |
Euroguff University – West Germany v Italy, semi-final World Cup, Mexico 70
As a forerunner of Thursday's match, let's look back to a previous encounter (cold war nomenclature discounted) between these teams. A great match, in the days where games had jazz-samba soundtracks and incredible tracksuits.??Given that stretchers are mandatory today for cramp, it's quite astonishing that Beckenbauer dislocates his shoulder and just gets up by himself.
Tweets for my tweet, sugar for my honey??
And I had so many ideas for headlines
"Anti pasta"; crude photoshops of the Italian Job; maybe a Cornetto reference or two. The lot!
If only Joe Hart had been to Euroguff University
Well done to Italy
Fully deserved. And they saved us from what would have been exactly the same fate (but worse) v Germany on Thursday.
NEVER MIND!??
England may be out, but Euroguff is immortal. Three more games to go and anyone could win* All the quarter final exit points are now in, but there are 16 points still to play for.
| Kafka | Time Loop | ?? | |
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 72 |
| 2= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 64 |
| 2= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 64 |
| 4= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 62 |
| 4= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 62 |
| 6= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 60 |
| 6= | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 6= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 60 |
| 6= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 60 |
| 10= | Tim Henman | david hickson | 58 |
| 10= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 58 |
| 10= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 58 |
| 10= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 58 |
| 10= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 58 |
| 10= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 58 |
| 16= | B B Foot | Rory | 56 |
| 16= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 16= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 56 |
| 16= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 56 |
| 16= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 56 |
| 16= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 56 |
| 22= | DK Willy | DK | 54 |
| 22= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 54 |
| 22= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 54 |
| 22= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 54 |
| 22= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 54 |
| 22= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 54 |
| 28= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 52 |
| 28= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 52 |
| 28= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 52 |
| 28= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 52 |
| 28= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 52 |
| 33= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 50 |
| 33= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 50 |
| 33= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 50 |
| 33= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 50 |
| 33= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 50 |
| 33= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 50 |
| 33= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 50 |
| 33= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 50 |
| 41= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 48 |
| 41= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 48 |
| 41= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 48 |
| 41= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 48 |
| 45= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 46 |
| 45= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 46 |
| 45= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 46 |
| 48= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 48= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 44 |
| 48= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 44 |
| 48= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 44 |
| 48= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 44 |
| 48= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 48= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 44 |
| 55= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 55= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 42 |
| 55= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 55= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 42 |
| 55= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 42 |
| 55= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 61= | Strev87 | dave strevett | 40 |
| 61= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 63= | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 38 |
| 63= | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 65 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 36 |
Comfort Tweeting
* winners don't do drugs
Categories
Hair today
The Germans await and, increasingly, England expects.??
How will the papers take the result? We asked Dr Emmet Brown to explain tabloid timelines:
Free England hat!
Simply follow these instructions to support the Engerland
- Print out this bowler hat
- Ask an adult to use some scissors to carefully cut round the edge
- Use double-sided Sellotape and stick onto a Cornflakes packet
- That's it!
Standings
Can anyone catch Paulo Di Harringtono?
| My Name is, my name is | Slim Shady | ?? | |
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 68 |
| 2= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 60 |
| 2= | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 2= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 60 |
| 2= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 60 |
| 6= | Tim Henman | david hickson | 58 |
| 6= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 58 |
| 6= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 58 |
| 6= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 58 |
| 6= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 58 |
| 6= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 58 |
| 12= | B B Foot | Rory | 56 |
| 12= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 12= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 56 |
| 12= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 56 |
| 12= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 56 |
| 17= | DK Willy | DK | 54 |
| 17= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 54 |
| 17= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 54 |
| 17= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 54 |
| 17= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 54 |
| 17= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 54 |
| 17= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 54 |
| 24= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 52 |
| 24= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 52 |
| 24= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 52 |
| 24= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 52 |
| 24= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 52 |
| 29= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 50 |
| 29= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 50 |
| 29= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 50 |
| 32= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 48 |
| 32= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 48 |
| 32= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 48 |
| 32= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 48 |
| 32= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 48 |
| 37= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 46 |
| 37= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 46 |
| 37= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 46 |
| 37= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 46 |
| 37= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 46 |
| 37= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 46 |
| 37= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 46 |
| 37= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 46 |
| 45= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 44 |
| 45= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 45= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 44 |
| 45= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 44 |
| 45= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 45= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 44 |
| 51= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 51= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 42 |
| 51= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 51= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 42 |
| 51= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 42 |
| 51= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 42 |
| 51= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 58= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 40 |
| 58= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 58= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 40 |
| 58= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 40 |
| 62 | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 63= | Strev87 | dave strevett | 36 |
| 63= | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 36 |
| 65 | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 34 |
??- David Cameron offering moral guidance, yesterday
Up the Twitter
Categories
Geo-wallpaper
Wow:
Satellite Eyes is a simple Mac app that automatically changes your desktop wallpaper to the satellite view of where you are, right now
Categories
David Eagleman – Incognito
Bought this on a whim after hearing the author on Richard Bacon's Five Live show. It's an exploration of neuroscience and specifically the wonders of the subconscious.??
The most illuminating thought for me was around the de-centering of our conscious self. What that means is accepting that what we usually think of as ourselves is really just a tiny part of the whole brain. And in the same way we had to adapt to the earth not actually being the centre of the universe, it's rather sobering and wonderous to realise there's a lot more to our brains than the bits we can consciously access.
QF2: Germany v Greece – exclusive photograph
QF3: France v Spain
On paper, wine-guzzling France should trounce their bull-bothering neighbours, but there are no easy games at this level
??
Standings
Just four points were up for grabs for those who had Greece facing an impossible defecit last night
| Greece name | Grease name | ?? | |
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 64 |
| 2 | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 3= | Tim Henman | david hickson | 58 |
| 3= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 58 |
| 5= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 56 |
| 5= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 5= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 56 |
| 5= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 56 |
| 9= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 54 |
| 9= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 54 |
| 9= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 54 |
| 9= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 54 |
| 9= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 54 |
| 14= | B B Foot | Rory | 52 |
| 14= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 52 |
| 14= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 52 |
| 14= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 52 |
| 14= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 52 |
| 14= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 52 |
| 14= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 52 |
| 14= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 52 |
| 22= | DK Willy | DK | 50 |
| 22= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 50 |
| 22= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 50 |
| 22= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 50 |
| 22= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 50 |
| 22= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 50 |
| 28= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 48 |
| 28= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 48 |
| 28= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 48 |
| 28= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 48 |
| 32= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 46 |
| 32= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 46 |
| 32= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 46 |
| 32= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 46 |
| 32= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 46 |
| 32= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 46 |
| 38= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 44 |
| 38= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 38= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 44 |
| 38= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 44 |
| 38= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 44 |
| 38= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 38= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 44 |
| 45= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 45= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 45= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 42 |
| 45= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 42 |
| 45= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 42 |
| 45= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 42 |
| 45= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 42 |
| 45= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 45= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 42 |
| 54= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 40 |
| 54= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 40 |
| 54= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 54= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 40 |
| 54= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 40 |
| 59= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 38 |
| 59= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 38 |
| 59= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 38 |
| 59= | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 63 | Strev87 | dave strevett | 36 |
| 64 | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 34 |
| 65 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 32 |
Twitter, Twitter ??ber alles
Haloumi, Hallo you
I am typing this on one of those new retsina screens ahead of donertime tonight when Greece will pitta their skills against Germany.??May the feta team win.
Six percent of Ouzoguffers have Greece going out at this stage, and 11% have the Germans coming down from Mount Olympus.??
The Greek teamsheet
But for hamstring injuries, and certain fantastical beasts, the Greek XI could have been heroic:
- Achilles, hero of the Trojan War and a central character in Homer's Iliad
- Ajax the Great, a hero of the Trojan War and king of Salamis
- Bellerophon, hero who slew the Chimera
- Daedalus, creator of the labyrinth and great inventor.
- Diomedes, a king of Argos (not the shop) and hero of the Trojan War
- Ganymede, Trojan hero and lover of Zeus, who was given immortality and appointed cup-bearer to the gods
- Jason, leader of the Argonauts
- Odysseus, a hero and king of Ithaca whose adventures are the subject of Homer's Odyssey
- Orpheus, a legendary musician and poet who attempted to retrieve his dead wife from the Underworld
- Perseus, son of Zeus and the founder-king of Mycenae and slayer of the Gorgon Medusa
- Theseus, son of Poseidon, a king of Athens and slayer of the Minotaur
Stand in the place where you were, now face north. Think about direction wonder why you haven't before
League table after last night's Ronaldo show. 48% of you correctly predicted a Czech exit at this stage.
| Hummus | Taramasalata | ?? | |
| 1 | Paulo Di Harringtonio | Paul Harrington | 64 |
| 2 | Yankee's Spankers | Dave Robertshaw | 60 |
| 3 | Tim Henman | david hickson | 58 |
| 4= | Ronaldo McDonald?? | Cephas Howard?? | 56 |
| 4= | Mrs Euroguff | Mrs Carlosfandango_ | 56 |
| 4= | Fabio Crapello | Martin B | 56 |
| 4= | Stevie's Wunders | Steve Andrews | 56 |
| 8= | Simon Grayson | Paul Revy | 54 |
| 8= | Brown Fox | Jim Chambers | 54 |
| 8= | Arsenedof Nowhere | Darren Hanson | 54 |
| 8= | Simoneo Huesserelli | Simon Huesser | 54 |
| 8= | Gazza | Gary Taylor | 54 |
| 8= | Swiss T | Thomas Angst | 54 |
| 14= | B B Foot | Rory | 52 |
| 14= | Vuvuzela???? | Sandra Benfer | 52 |
| 14= | Christophe Woodini | Chris Wood | 52 |
| 14= | Anjusha Klins-Morinho | Anna Wilson | 52 |
| 14= | The Special [Measures] One | Tim Donnelly Smith | 52 |
| 14= | Letina lotagoals?? | Berry | 52 |
| 20= | DK Willy | DK | 50 |
| 20= | Sepp Bladder | Carl Mesner Lyons | 50 |
| 20= | roy the hodgson | harvey | 50 |
| 20= | Naven Johnson | Eddie Vassallo | 50 |
| 20= | Kicker Conspiracy | Tim Fiddies | 50 |
| 20= | Hansi Mueller | Bernd Friedle | 50 |
| 26= | Scotty McNasty | Andrew Robb | 48 |
| 26= | Canary | Simon Barnes | 48 |
| 26= | Mozzer | Paul Conroy | 48 |
| 26= | Wheat Dodger | Leanne McGirr | 48 |
| 26= | Hatch's Heros | Chris Matthews | 48 |
| 26= | Del Garnett | Darren Gavigan | 48 |
| 32= | Benny The Ball | Nick Townend | 46 |
| 32= | Jigsaw (goes to pieces in the box) | Matt Brooke-Smith | 46 |
| 32= | Toy Dodgson | Kelsey O | 46 |
| 32= | Harry Redface | Dan McGrath | 46 |
| 32= | Is Pele Playing? | John Orta | 46 |
| 32= | Wicked Woy Wodgson | David Patterson | 46 |
| 38= | Andy Grey | Darren Holdaway | 44 |
| 38= | 2012sheds | Pete smith | 44 |
| 38= | Toy Bodgson | Tom Barton | 44 |
| 38= | Big Ron Colonel Saunders | Andrew Hartland | 44 |
| 38= | Normski Gunner | Norman House | 44 |
| 38= | Dirk Diggler | Nik Goodman | 44 |
| 44= | Bayer Neverlusen | Rob Broome | 42 |
| 44= | Mike Bassett | Eamonn Newell | 42 |
| 44= | Don revie | Simon Andrews | 42 |
| 44= | Earsane Wanger | Paul Shaw | 42 |
| 44= | Tom Laidlaw | Tom Laidlaw | 42 |
| 44= | Ivor Greatidea | Steve Edney | 42 |
| 44= | Bring Back Bobby Robson | Dan Jamieson | 42 |
| 44= | Bill Shankly | Bob Steadman | 42 |
| 44= | Trap A Tony | Tony Power | 42 |
| 53= | Dario Made-the-Gradi | David of Crook | 40 |
| 53= | El Pringle | Keith Pringle | 40 |
| 53= | Steve Mclaren | JT | 40 |
| 53= | Septic Tank Charlton | Jeremy Crisp | 40 |
| 53= | Mr. Awesome | Geroge Pokorny | 40 |
| 53= | Claudio Inglesias Failte | Claude Tonna-Barthet | 40 |
| 59= | Roy Hodgson | John Catterfeld | 38 |
| 59= | McFuddle 'O Toole | Gordon?? | 38 |
| 59= | George Osborne is a twat | Andy Young | 38 |
| 59= | Messi Gardener | Johnny T?? | 38 |
| 63 | Strev87 | dave strevett | 36 |
| 64 | Lorem Ipsum | Jon D | 34 |
| 65 | Soccer Sage | Mike Xenakis | 32 |
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