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Conference Troll

I have an idea for a comedy vehicle, which I have neither the front nor the inclination to do myself. It's called Conference Troll.

It's based on the shared horror of the business conference – those cathedrals of pity that take place up and down the halls and venues of our land every day. The school assembly chair layout, the supersized PowerPoint and the uncomfortable suits exposed under spotlights. 

It seems to me that these are rarely useful for the attendees, but merely revenue machines for the organisers and a personal job advert for the speakers.

My favourite moment of horror is the Q&A session. That bit where pimped-up ballboys scurry up and down the aisles with microphones so people can ask questions. And this is the bit that needs trolling.

I envisage someone asking "Borat meets the Office" style questions. Said with a straight face, these would be Brass Eye ridiculous, yet scrape through the credibility test. I see a series of these uploaded to youtube, puncturing the dreadful solemnity of these moments and providing fleeting moments of levity for the captives present.

(File under #catharsis)
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Apostrophes secured to this sign will be removed

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100 things you needn’t do before you die

I hate those "40 things before you're 40" lists. Whose life are you suppose to be living?

I think there's a book to be had called "100 things you needn't do before you die". The anti-guide to what you don't have to do. 

It's just as valid to aspire to staying in bed listening to the cricket than to paraglide up Mont Bollocks.
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Snow dog fun

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Crowdsourced Star Wars

Brilliantly inventive and enjoyable

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The pre-sleb era

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I came across this 26 year old copy of the Times today – November 11, 1985

I would have been nearly 18 when it was published, but now it feels it
belongs to an age a good deal earlier than that – the 70s maybe or
even the 60s.

This is 10 years before the web made any impression on even early
adopters. It shows a Britain full of strikes, an Apartheid-era South
Africa, denser news, chess coverage in depth, football violence and,
perhaps most strikingly of all… no celebrity stories.

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It wouldn’t be Xmas without…

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Best card game ever

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Pleased to read that the best card game ever, Shithead, is known as
Shit Pants (Paskahousu) in Finland.

Rules: http://www.pagat.com/beating/shithead.html

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Provocative book design

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I’ve just started reading this. It’s a very well regarded novel from
Philip K. Dick set in an alternate 1960s where America has lost the
war.

It’s a startling cover design and I can imagine there’d be a few
quizzical looks if I were to read it on the train.

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The West Wing looks dated already

Watching the first couple of series of the West Wing from 1999-2001 and it already looks dated:

– what once looked like a manic tempo of corridor conversations is now standard or pedestrian compared to today’s offices

– some social issues such as controversies around gay marriage seem WTF

– the tech is comical. Mobiles are hardly ever used and monitors are massive (apart from black PowerBooks with upside down Apple logos)

– the tight news agenda of “It’ll be in the papers tomorrow” has been blown apart by Twitter

– they bask in economic growth

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Just switched on iTunes Match

I wonder how many of my songs it will recognise.

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Euros Childs

A mix of solo songs and Gorky’s favourites. Euros was both angelic and goofy.

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http://instagr.am/p/ZLIpB/

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The outdoor Xmas fridge is back

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xmas decorations

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There’s a Cyberman hiding in this cigarette bin

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I took these Movember photos at work

A great cause and a also good excuse to try out some portrait photography

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DumbPhone

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I’d like an iPhone app called DumbPhone which would alleviate
distraction and overuse of the interweb by blanking out all apps other
than the actual phone.

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Tickets nostalgia #7: Terry Hall

Probably my favourite singer. Everything he’s done has been great and I’d love him to release more solo stuff – it’s been ages.

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Easy, perfect rice

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My dad’s recipe. It really works.

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Working life’s a Gas

My degree included a year’s work experience, which I spent quite enjoyably at British Gas in Staines (this is long before Ali G). It had not long been privatised, and in hindsight it was a fascinating time to be there.

Note in this picture that I didn’t have a PC on my desk. I did have a Lever Arch file and a copy of the Guardian though. Des was my boss (a top bloke who I saw the Pixies with).
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Here’s a shot down the office. Everything looks quite beige now.

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I liked Pat. She was quite spunky and unlike anyone I’d met before. Note the PCs in the background running Lotus 1-2-3 (a precursor to Excel). I totally bossed that programme.

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Amazingly, we had a clocking in/out system. You could build up half hours here and there to easily earn days off. People routinely had 30-40 holiday days a year

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